I do think one of the big differences between when we were BKs and now ... is us. Other ex-BKs and the internet across which we can communicate.
I think we and what we have discovered can act as a more powerful "detergent" breaking the film, or delusion, of BKism by little more than firm but gentle accurate crticisms and truths.
In the old days, ex-BKs just disappeared and were ostracised by the elders. Their BK mind set or paradigm busting influence was kept away from the newly indoctrinated. I think it would be useful for us to prepare a written statement saying, "Look, we were you once and this is what we found ... this is what is going to happen ...".
It may not have an immediate effect, it may have an overnight effect, who knows. But it will plant seeds in their minds just as exiting BKs did in mine when I was a BK. Especially, for me, when their humour rose above BK fear mongering tactics.
I am hoping that their Father is no so deeply into BKism that they have a total grip over him yet. That there is still a chance to pull him out.
If not, I would argue that they need to prepare themselves to cut him out as surely, and more quickly, as the BKs would have him cut them off. And protect the family's interests, eg wealth, property etc.
To sit him down in a genuinely concerned manner - not to confront or argue with him and not to allow him to proselytize BKism (to try and convert) - with the whole family, members of these other families, his boss or workmates, and a statement from us would surely have some effect. Allow him to think overnight about it.
The family also needs to think about what they would do/feel/cope with an 'either/or' situation and prepare themselves for that, eg would he demand to take half the property, would he pay support for the wife and child etc.
The thing you, Prerna, don't realise yet is that if you Father goes down the route of BKism 100% ... all you will be left with is a shell on the outside. A lodger in your own house. A BK agent looking for any opportunity to promote BKism and convert the rest of you.
To me, it appears he is very close to that already ... which is why I am asking things like, "where does he eat?" and about his love life to work out his degree of BK commitment.
Something else ... the way fully committed BK Brothers used to work is that they would give their entire wage to the BK Sister - as if she was their wife or mother - and she would give him back enough pocket money to live on (I don't know if they still practise this).
I'd be carefully monitoring the amount of money he is giving the BKs and most certainly, taking control over any mutual family wealth.
If he is married ... he took holy vows with his wife. He entered into a partnership. Finances are a partnership issue.
The BKs will try and make him break those vows and partnership and if they cannot control (convert) the partner, then will increasing try and split it so that they get a bigger cut of his income and wealth.
I think we and what we have discovered can act as a more powerful "detergent" breaking the film, or delusion, of BKism by little more than firm but gentle accurate crticisms and truths.
In the old days, ex-BKs just disappeared and were ostracised by the elders. Their BK mind set or paradigm busting influence was kept away from the newly indoctrinated. I think it would be useful for us to prepare a written statement saying, "Look, we were you once and this is what we found ... this is what is going to happen ...".
It may not have an immediate effect, it may have an overnight effect, who knows. But it will plant seeds in their minds just as exiting BKs did in mine when I was a BK. Especially, for me, when their humour rose above BK fear mongering tactics.
I am hoping that their Father is no so deeply into BKism that they have a total grip over him yet. That there is still a chance to pull him out.
If not, I would argue that they need to prepare themselves to cut him out as surely, and more quickly, as the BKs would have him cut them off. And protect the family's interests, eg wealth, property etc.
To sit him down in a genuinely concerned manner - not to confront or argue with him and not to allow him to proselytize BKism (to try and convert) - with the whole family, members of these other families, his boss or workmates, and a statement from us would surely have some effect. Allow him to think overnight about it.
The family also needs to think about what they would do/feel/cope with an 'either/or' situation and prepare themselves for that, eg would he demand to take half the property, would he pay support for the wife and child etc.
The thing you, Prerna, don't realise yet is that if you Father goes down the route of BKism 100% ... all you will be left with is a shell on the outside. A lodger in your own house. A BK agent looking for any opportunity to promote BKism and convert the rest of you.
To me, it appears he is very close to that already ... which is why I am asking things like, "where does he eat?" and about his love life to work out his degree of BK commitment.
Something else ... the way fully committed BK Brothers used to work is that they would give their entire wage to the BK Sister - as if she was their wife or mother - and she would give him back enough pocket money to live on (I don't know if they still practise this).
I'd be carefully monitoring the amount of money he is giving the BKs and most certainly, taking control over any mutual family wealth.
If he is married ... he took holy vows with his wife. He entered into a partnership. Finances are a partnership issue.
The BKs will try and make him break those vows and partnership and if they cannot control (convert) the partner, then will increasing try and split it so that they get a bigger cut of his income and wealth.