Dear divine Brothers & Sisters,
Om Shanti,
Firstly thanks for a platform where I can discuss this serious issue of my BK life ...!
Baba says lust is the only test and is the biggest test that we have to face. Even though it is so important to conquer lust no body is willing to talk openly about it. I want to initiate it. I need your help to guide me based on your experience. I understand some of the souls on this forum are very senior and surrendered BK's or ex-BKs please advise what I should do.
It becomes OK in between and then it comes up again ... the lustful thoughts, feelings etc...Last few days I am receiving several storms of Maya (lust) and I am failing - i.e. I am not able to control those thoughts and my sense organs are deceiving me. Fantasies continue like anything. Sometimes I think if there is some medicine which I can eat and then atleast the sensual organs can stop reacting to those fantasies. But I do not know if there is any such thing available! To really apply that full stop!!!
I feel so guilty - sometimes I am not able to face Baba and also feel like comitting suicide but I know it is not the solution and hence I do not do it and hence I am still alive typing this story of mine .
When those storms come frankly speaking I tend to enjoy those thoughts ... Inspite of knowing that it is wrong I am not able to stop them (apply break) and it continues... and once you allow it ... it will be there for several hours until you really really have to put a full stop. Its like Maya boxing on each and every part of your body ... ouch!
I am badly beaten up by Maya ... can someone please prescribe any ointment. I understand things like churning knowledge, doing Yoga, reading books can help ... but I want to practically really get rid of this. I also understand that this is part of the sanskar of several births and its showing up ... but how can I get rid of this?
Brothers and Sisters ... please help based on your experiences ... I am not able to discuss this issue with anyone else ... If I go and tell this to my centre in-charge I am not sure what I will be taken as ... as If I am the only one who is facing this issue. Its so funny ... everyone knows that this is the biggest test and even Baba says in Murli but still there is no one with whom I can discuss this issue and seek guidance. Hence I approach this forum for appropriate guidance on this matter of conquering lust and lustful thoughts and feelings.
I really thank everyone on this forum in advance for their contributions. I really want to practise celibacy in 100% of its meaning!
Om Shanti,
Firstly thanks for a platform where I can discuss this serious issue of my BK life ...!
Baba says lust is the only test and is the biggest test that we have to face. Even though it is so important to conquer lust no body is willing to talk openly about it. I want to initiate it. I need your help to guide me based on your experience. I understand some of the souls on this forum are very senior and surrendered BK's or ex-BKs please advise what I should do.
It becomes OK in between and then it comes up again ... the lustful thoughts, feelings etc...Last few days I am receiving several storms of Maya (lust) and I am failing - i.e. I am not able to control those thoughts and my sense organs are deceiving me. Fantasies continue like anything. Sometimes I think if there is some medicine which I can eat and then atleast the sensual organs can stop reacting to those fantasies. But I do not know if there is any such thing available! To really apply that full stop!!!
I feel so guilty - sometimes I am not able to face Baba and also feel like comitting suicide but I know it is not the solution and hence I do not do it and hence I am still alive typing this story of mine .
When those storms come frankly speaking I tend to enjoy those thoughts ... Inspite of knowing that it is wrong I am not able to stop them (apply break) and it continues... and once you allow it ... it will be there for several hours until you really really have to put a full stop. Its like Maya boxing on each and every part of your body ... ouch!
I am badly beaten up by Maya ... can someone please prescribe any ointment. I understand things like churning knowledge, doing Yoga, reading books can help ... but I want to practically really get rid of this. I also understand that this is part of the sanskar of several births and its showing up ... but how can I get rid of this?
Brothers and Sisters ... please help based on your experiences ... I am not able to discuss this issue with anyone else ... If I go and tell this to my centre in-charge I am not sure what I will be taken as ... as If I am the only one who is facing this issue. Its so funny ... everyone knows that this is the biggest test and even Baba says in Murli but still there is no one with whom I can discuss this issue and seek guidance. Hence I approach this forum for appropriate guidance on this matter of conquering lust and lustful thoughts and feelings.
I really thank everyone on this forum in advance for their contributions. I really want to practise celibacy in 100% of its meaning!