Dear Sarah,
I feel I can sympathise with your feelings. Do you feel it's like a self-punishment? I sort of keep myself down like that, sometimes, in my own ways.
But counter to that, I have some feelings that I'll try and put into (somewhat sufficient) words:
There is a certain drive behind the fact that we get out of bed each morning, the fact that we keep taking breaths again and again, a certain drive behind the growth of plants and trees, and every action and movement made in this world. It's like the heart's desire of every being. And it's the desire for peace, liberty, love - God, Buddha-Nature, Rigpa, True Mind, The Great Spirit or whatever you want to call it.
I feel that behind everything, even hate, is love. Hate is just love twisted, when someone believes they must struggle and fight for that peace, love and liberty. Everything is for the love of peace, liberty and love itself - God. And my feelings go further - I feel that everything is love. Love is the cause behind every thing, every occurance. Everything is love. Or, in the words of Adi Shankara: "God is the only reality."
This is something I see, my experience. Every day I try to open up to that more and more. The idea that we're supposed to be doing something, being something - It's just an idea. But we cling to that idea and believe that it defines reality. And it can make us really suffer.
Having the idea that we lack something is, in effect, the very same as being seperate from that thing we think we lack. If you let go of the idea of lacking something, you let go of not having it, as both are just mutually dependent ideas. And ideas do not define reality. We can let go of the idea that we need something and that we don't have something, but it takes courage. All these ideas that we have, it takes a lot of courage to let them go and just face reality as it is, giving up control and attempts to try and make it into what our base desires want.
Well, that's the best I can explain myself today.
I feel I can sympathise with your feelings. Do you feel it's like a self-punishment? I sort of keep myself down like that, sometimes, in my own ways.
But counter to that, I have some feelings that I'll try and put into (somewhat sufficient) words:
There is a certain drive behind the fact that we get out of bed each morning, the fact that we keep taking breaths again and again, a certain drive behind the growth of plants and trees, and every action and movement made in this world. It's like the heart's desire of every being. And it's the desire for peace, liberty, love - God, Buddha-Nature, Rigpa, True Mind, The Great Spirit or whatever you want to call it.
I feel that behind everything, even hate, is love. Hate is just love twisted, when someone believes they must struggle and fight for that peace, love and liberty. Everything is for the love of peace, liberty and love itself - God. And my feelings go further - I feel that everything is love. Love is the cause behind every thing, every occurance. Everything is love. Or, in the words of Adi Shankara: "God is the only reality."
This is something I see, my experience. Every day I try to open up to that more and more. The idea that we're supposed to be doing something, being something - It's just an idea. But we cling to that idea and believe that it defines reality. And it can make us really suffer.
Having the idea that we lack something is, in effect, the very same as being seperate from that thing we think we lack. If you let go of the idea of lacking something, you let go of not having it, as both are just mutually dependent ideas. And ideas do not define reality. We can let go of the idea that we need something and that we don't have something, but it takes courage. All these ideas that we have, it takes a lot of courage to let them go and just face reality as it is, giving up control and attempts to try and make it into what our base desires want.
Well, that's the best I can explain myself today.