Mr Green wrote:Forgiveness is not powerful enough to heal deep subconsciuos wounds, you can say I forgive as much as you like but it can just be an intellectual excercise to those in real pain. Feel free to post smart ass comments like you have to really forgive from the heart, but sometimes it's not as easy as that. In fact, this is a good example of the daft simplistic approach some take whilst pretending they have changed.
I appreciate what you are saying here. Very often, the BK approach seems superficial "fake it until you make it". A lot of the virtues listed like "forgiveness", "mercy" can seem tough when you are really hurting inside. They also, to my mind, have connotatations of blame and guilt. Which is why in my experience the only thing that works is love. Unconditional love with no strings attached; and I find I cant accept love or give love out unless I first love myself.
I suppose the other thing is understanding. I mean real understanding in a spiritual sense. Not just saying "its drama", which frankly never worked for me, but understanding why people behave the way they do, and understanding and accepting that I am going to feel cr*p about some things and that that is OK.
I wonder what the Hindi interpretation of their word for forgiveness is? There is a lot of heavy feelings attached to that word ...